Coping with monday with a little help from emacs's built in shrink

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I am the psychotherapist. Please, describe your problems. Each time
you are finished talking, type RET twice.

I need to speak chinese.

Why do you say you might want to speak?

Because speaking only english is very frustrating.

Is it because speaking only english is very frustrating that you came
to me?

I wish there was a universal language.

What makes you believe you wish there was an universal language?

Because people need to be able to understand one another.

Does it bother you that people need to be able to understand one
another?

It doesn't just bother me, but wars seem to accumulate at the borders
between people's comprehension indexes.

When did you first know that wars seem to accumulate at the borders
between people's comprehension indexes?

I guess I was 8, when the first war in Israel that I'd heard of broke out.

Is the fact that you would heard of broke out the real reason?

Well, I had only recently graduated from "goo goo, and Gaa gaa" at the time.

Earlier you said you would like to speak?

Chinese, yes.

Maybe your plans have something to do with this.

Well, I'm planning on going to China in a month or so, and I'm just
bewildered by the language barrier going both ways.

Are you sure of that?

Damn sure.

I would appreciate it if you would watch your tongue!

Why would watching my tongue help?

Does the fact that would watching your tongue help explain anything
else?

I'd have stayed out of a lot more trouble had I held my tongue more often.

You mentioned that speaking only english is very frustrating?

Well, I speak C, C++, shell, lisp, php, perl, and multiple assembly languages - but all of these languages were derived from english, and from english mneumonics - so trying to interact with a programmer that doesn't speak english natively is a real trial.

Are you sure does not speak english natively is a real trial?

Damn sure.

Perhaps you could avoid such unwholesome thoughts.

Well, the managers of the world seem to think they can outsource all
of engineering overseas, and I think it's because they think software
engineers don't speak english in the first place, but we do,
everything we code is merely a specialized subset of English.

Is it because they think software engineers do not speak English in
the first place that you came to me?

Yea. Thanks doc.
  ¶ 11:49 AM